Skip to content

TABLE TENNIS NEWS: COACH LARRY, THE MOVIE

 

———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Charlatang <gusikoff1…@gmail.com>
Date: Apr 1, 9:53 pm
Subject: COACH LARRY, THE MOVIE
To: rec.sport.table-tennis

Table tennis icon Larry Hodge has recently agreed to a $5 million
dollar deal for COACH LARRY THE MOVIE in which he will supply
technical advice and do cameos.  Of corse,  it complicated things when
a great deal of the movie is about Mr. Hodges and what a total buffoon
that he had been in the past.

To this Coach Larry says:
“Yeeess! Yeees!  I know that I completely sold out to the sponge
rubber manufactures and their dealers, but what can a person do who
can’t get a good  job in another field with NORMAL [laughter] people.
I mean, GQ’s slam on me was dead-on,  saying that I had a personality
somewhere between a high-functioning autistic and a social misfit.
That really hurt at the time.  But that’s all changed now thanks to
my good friend Ed Ball who got
me to change my diet, do a colon cleanse–[copious laughter] 10-foot
tape worm in a bottle over the mantle at home–and got me  into yoga–
Chris Reed, Reed’s Ginger Brew,  is personally chauffeuring me to Sri
Sri Shankar’s “Secrets of Meditation”  program, April 19-21, LA
Ashram.  Thanks, Chris!  Love you Pundaji!!!”

Coach Larry says that his focus in life has completely changed since
the cleanse and the the movie in offing, Coach Larry saying the key to
the movie’s success is the script,  “the scenes are terse, well
written” and that the Liha (Sandpaper) revolution is the film’s theme.

The film was written by Mr. Charlie Kaufman.  Mr. Kaufman says of the
script, “It’s an American-Philipino black comedy-fantasy.  I’m
especially proud the of the Marty Reisman-Peter Cua age-regression
series.  These table tennis revolutionaries are the Fathers of
Postmodern Liha. They deserve their day in the sun.”

Mr Val Kilmer,  who playing Mr Reisman in the movie, has been taking Liha lessons from Ms Tawny Banh and Ms
Crystal Huang at their El Monte club.  “The Girls are the best
instructors I’ve ever had, and I’ve had  first-rated instructors in
other sports, karate, yoga, skiing.”  He said that The Girls have one
of the best Liha scenes in the movie that show the hard and soft
element  of Liha:  Ms Banh, the “power player,” hitting hard into Ms
Huang’s  defensive, “control-player” game.

In this scene, seasoned actor and US National Hardbat Champion Adoni
Maropis oversees the match, playing “a real hard-ass Lord Shiva.”

Mr Kilmer said, “The modern flat-sponge is a total sham, a total bore.
When I see Tawny and Crystal play the modern sponge game–I don’t
know–how can anyone get into a one-dimensional, 2-ball game? Nothing
to watch.  The Girls have a repertoire of stroke that are tantalizing
to behold in Liha.  Crystal chop-blocking, Tawny feigning a flick.
It’s poetry in motion.”

Against all wishes of Mr Hodges, a subplot,  which binds the story
together, was inserted into the script about a love story based on
Diego Schaaf and his wife National Coach Wei Wang , who will
reportedly be played by Richard Starkey (Ringo Starr, laconic Beatles’
drummer) and an A-list hottie.  The Tip Top Cowboy (Starkey) has some
laugh-out-loud scenes with his “uncontrolled indoor re-gluing fetish”
in the lovebirds USATT players’ lounge.

Larry Hodges , in his last interview with me last week, said the
following:

“Ed Ball has been incredibly accurate. His information is
incontrovertible. In controvertible.  Sure he makes little mistakes or
gets a number wrong.   Sure, but overall he’s been trying to tell the
truth.  Many people are figuring that out.  I’m  just so glad that the
Santa Monica College Foundation had the sense to put Ed’s table tennis
expose “How to Bring Classic Hardbat Table Tennis to [SMC] in the
hands of a movie mogul who could make it into a blockbuster that it
will be…26-pages,   Ed writing it for a SMC journalism class,
2001..Ed Ball’s got an incredible record of being accurate and the
COACH LARRY THE MOVIE will show this.
Yes.  I admit it: Coach Sean O’Neill and I  were not good for the
trendy Schaafs.  We have both intervened on Ed’s behave.  I’m so glad
to say that he’s now training at the Schaafs’ West LA Club, both Diego
and Ed best of friend now.  [Laughter] Diego is 5-days into a fast
with a colonic  irrigation scheduled 5:00, today. Oh, almost forgot–
both Wei and Diego are technical advisors for filming.”

Mr. Ball was too busy giving Liha lessons to be interview, but he was
relieved that “certain simple misunderstanding had been
resolved. ” Then, over the phone he sang in a loud whisper, “Liha.
The most beautiful sound I ever heard
LIHA, LIHA, LIHA, LIHA and the line went dead.

Yours in Liha,

Clinton Charlatang
Promotion
LIHA INTERNAL
(We have the best instructors.)

Advertisements

COACH LARRY/THE MOVIE

 

 

 
Table tennis icon Larry Hodge has recently agreed to a $5 million dollar deal for COACH LARRY THE MOVIE in which he will supply technical advice and do cameos.  Of corse,  it complicated things when a great deal of the movie is about Mr. Hodges and what a total buffoon that he had been in the past. 
 
To this Coach Larry says:
“Yeeess! Yeees!  I know that I completely sold out to the sponge rubber manufactures and their dealers, but what can a person do who can’t get a good  job in another field with NORMAL [laughter] people.  I mean, GQ’s slam on me was dead-on,  saying that I had a personality
somewhere between a high-functioning autistic and a social misfit.  That really hurt at the time.  But that’s all changed now thanks to my good friend Ed Ball who got
me to change my diet, do a colon cleanse–[copious laughter] 10-foot tape worm in a bottle over the mantle at home–and got me  into yoga–Chris Reed, Reed’s Ginger Brew,  is personally chauffeuring me to Sri Sri Shankar’s “Secrets of Meditation”  program, April 19-21, LA Ashram.  Thanks, Chris!  Love you Pundaji!!!”
 
Coach Larry says that his focus in life has completely changed since the cleanse and the the movie in offing, Coach Larry saying the key to the movie’s success is the script,  “the scenes are terse, well written” and that the Liha (Sandpaper) revolution is the film’s theme.  
 
The film was written by Mr. Charlie Kaufman.  Mr. Kaufman says of the script, “It’s an American-Philipino black comedy-fantasy.  I’m especially proud the of the Marty Reisman-Peter Cua age-regression series.  These table tennis revolutionaries are the Fathers of Postmodern Liha. They deserve their day in the sun.”
 
Mr Kelmer has been taking Liha lessons from Ms Tawny Banh and Ms Crystal Huang at their El Monte club.  “The Girls are the best instructors I’ve ever had, and I’ve had  first-rated instructors in other sports, karate, yoga, skiing.”  He said that The Girls have one of the best Liha scenes in the movie that show the hard and soft element  of Liha:  Ms Banh, the “power player,” hitting hard into Ms Huang’s  defensive, “control-player” game.  
 
In this scene, seasoned actor and US National Hardbat Champion Adoni Maropis oversees the match, playing “a real hard-ass Lord Shiva.”
 
Mr Kelmer said, “The modern flat-sponge is a total sham, a total bore. When I see Tawny and Crystal play the modern sponge game–I don’t know–how can anyone get into a one-dimensional, 2-ball game? Nothing to watch.  The Girls have a repertoire of stroke that are tantalizing to behold in Liha.  Crystal chop-blocking, Tawny feigning a flick.  It’s poetry in motion.”
 
Against all wishes of Mr Hodges, a subplot,  which binds the story together, was inserted into the script about a love story based on Diego Schaaf and his wife National Coach Wei Wang , who will reportedly be played by Richard Starkey (Ringo Starr, laconic Beatles’ drummer) and an A-list hottie.  The Tip Top Cowboy (Starkey) has some laugh-out-loud scenes with his “uncontrolled indoor re-gluing fetish” in the lovebirds USATT players’ lounge.  
 
Larry Hodges , in his last interview with me last week, said the following:
 
“Ed Ball has been incredibly accurate. His information is incontrovertible. In controvertible.  Sure he make little mistakes or gets a number wrong.   Sure, but overall he’s been trying to tell the truth.  Many people are figuring that out.  I’m  just so glad that the Santa Monica College Foundation had the sense to put Ed’s table tennis expose “How to Bring Classic Hardbat Table Tennis to [SMC] in the hands of a movie mogul who could make it into a blockbuster that it will be…26-pages,   Ed writing it for a SMC journalism class, 2001..Ed Ball’s got an incredible record of being accurate and the COACH LARRY THE MOVIE will show this. 
Yes.  I admit it: Coach Sean O’Neill and I  were not good for the trendy Schaafs.  We have both intervened on Ed’s behave.  I’m so glad to say that he’s now training at the Schaafs’ West LA Club, both Diego and Ed best of friend now.  [Laughter] Diego is 5-days into a fast with a colonic  irrigation scheduled 5:00, today. Oh, almost forgot–both Wei and Diego are technical advisors for filming.” 
 
Mr. Ball was too busy giving Liha lessons to be interview, but he was relieved that “certain simple misunderstanding had been 
resolved. ” Then, over the phone he sang in a loud whisper, “Liha. 
The most beautiful sound I ever heard
LIHA, LIHA, LIHA, LIHA and the line went dead. 
 
Yours in Liha, 
 
Clinton Charlatang
Promotion
LIHA INTERNAL
(We have the best instructors.)
 
 

COACH LARRY THE MOVIE

Table tennis icon Coach Larry Hodge has recently agreed to a $5 million dollar deal for COACH LARRY THE MOVIE in which he will supply technical advice and do cameos.  Of corse,  it complicated things when a great deal of the movie is about Mr. Hodges and what a total buffoon that he had been in the past. 

To this Coach Larry says:
“Yeeess! Yeees!  I know that I completely sold out to the sponge rubber manufactures and their dealers, but what can a person do who can’t get a good  job in another field with NORMAL [laughter] people.  I mean, GQ’s slam on me was dead-on,  saying that I had a personality
somewhere between a high-functioning autistic and a social misfit.  That really hurt at the time.  But that’s all changed now thanks to my good friend Ed Ball who got
me to change my diet, do a colon cleanse–[copious laughter] 10-foot tape worm in a bottle over the mantle at home–and got me  into yoga–Chris Reed, Reed’s Ginger Brew,  is personally chauffeuring me to Sri Sri Shankar’s “Secrets of Meditation”  program, April 19-21, LA Ashram.  Thanks, Chris!  Love you Pundaji!!!”

Coach Larry says that his focus in life has completely changed since the cleanse and the the movie in offing, Coach Larry saying the key to the movie’s success is the script,  “the scenes are terse, well written” and that the Liha (Sandpaper) revolution is the film’s theme.  

The film was written by Mr. Charlie Kaufman.  Mr. Kaufman says of the script, “It’s an American-Philipino black comedy-fantasy.  I’m especially proud the of the Marty Reisman-Peter Cua age-regression series.  These table tennis revolutionaries are the Fathers of Postmodern Liha. They deserve their day in the sun.”

Mr Kelmer has been taking Liha lessons from Ms Tawny Banh and Ms Crystal Huang at their El Monte club.  “The Girls are the best instructors I’ve ever had, and I’ve had  first-rated instructors in other sports, karate, yoga, skiing.”  He said that The Girls have one of the best Liha scenes in the movie that show the hard and soft element  of Liha:  Ms Banh, the “power player,” hitting hard into Ms Huang’s  defensive, “control-player” game.  

In this scene, seasoned actor and US National Hardbat Champion Adoni Maropis oversees the match, playing “a real hard-ass Lord Shiva.”

Mr Kelmer said, “The modern flat-sponge is a total sham, a total bore. When I see Tawny and Crystal play the modern sponge game–I don’t know–how can anyone get into a one-dimensional, 2-ball game? Nothing to watch.  The Girls have a repertoire of stroke that are tantalizing to behold in Liha.  Crystal chop-blocking, Tawny feigning a flick.  It’s poetry in motion.”

Against all wishes of Mr Hodges, a subplot,  which binds the story together, was inserted into the script about a love story based on Diego Schaaf and his wife National Coach Wei Wang , who will reportedly be played by Richard Starkey (Ringo Starr, laconic Beatles’ drummer) and an A-list hottie.  The Tip Top Cowboy (Starkey) has some laugh-out-loud scenes with his “uncontrolled indoor re-gluing fetish” in the lovebirds USATT players’ lounge.  

Larry Hodges , in his last interview with me last week, said the following:

“Ed Ball has been incredibly accurate. His information is incontrovertible. In controvertible.  Sure he make little mistakes or gets a number wrong.   Sure, but overall he’s been trying to tell the truth.  Many people are figuring that out.  I’m  just so glad that the Santa Monica College Foundation had the sense to put Ed’s table tennis expose “How to Bring Classic Hardbat Table Tennis to [SMC] in the hands of a movie mogul who could make it into a blockbuster that it will be…26-pages,   Ed writing it for a SMC journalism class, 2001..Ed Ball’s got an incredible record of being accurate and the COACH LARRY THE MOVIE will show this. 
Yes.  I admit it: Coach Sean O’Neill and I  were not good for the trendy Schaafs.  We have both intervened on Ed’s behave.  I’m so glad to say that he’s now training at the Schaafs’ West LA Club, both Diego and Ed best of friend now.  [Laughter] Diego is 5-days into a fast with a colonic  irrigation scheduled 5:00, today. Oh, almost forgot–both Wei and Diego are technical advisors for filming.” 

Mr. Ball was too busy giving Liha lessons to be interview, but he was relieved that “certain simple misunderstanding had been 
resolved. ” Then, over the phone he sang in a loud whisper, “Liha. 
The most beautiful sound I ever heard
LIHA, LIHA, LIHA, LIHA and the line went dead. 

Yours in Liha, 

Clinton Charlatang
Promotion
LIHA INTERNAL
(We have the best instructors.)

 

Hello world!

Welcome to WordPress.com. After you read this, you should delete and write your own post, with a new title above. Or hit Add New on the left (of the admin dashboard) to start a fresh post.

Here are some suggestions for your first post.

  1. You can find new ideas for what to blog about by reading the Daily Post.
  2. Add PressThis to your browser. It creates a new blog post for you about any interesting  page you read on the web.
  3. Make some changes to this page, and then hit preview on the right. You can always preview any post or edit it before you share it to the world.